Jack Yesner Week 7 - Achieving Inner Peace

 It always seems that so much is going on at the same time. Every day, it takes a precarious balancing act to go to school and after-school activities while also completing homework and any other necessary task. While all of this is happening, hundreds of things are happening all around, from others’ hectic lives to the outlandish and sometimes frightening events in the news. Among all of these things, it is incredibly easy to get stressed or overwhelmed.

Sometimes when I am feeling stressed, I am told that I should partake in meditation or relaxation exercises. It is hard to set time aside from everyday life to do this, but I genuinely try to shut out the rest of the world and achieve inner peace. Yet each meditative experience goes roughly the same: I sit, I hear things going on around me, my mind awakens, I begin thinking again, peace is not achieved, the meditation ends unsatisfyingly. Maybe I have a hyperactive brain, because no matter how hard I try it is impossible to gain clarity within the chaos of 

existence.

A summer camp trip in 2017 brought me to the Club Med resort in Port St. Lucie, Florida. The resort was all-inclusive, which meant the resort’s budget was severely lacking in other areas: mainly in activities. The only activities offered were eating, swimming, and water sports like kayaking and paddle boarding in the St. Lucie River. Having already done the first two to their limits in the first two days of the day trip, I entered my kayak with the intent to make it past the shallow lagoon and into the expansive river. Even though the water beneath me was dangerously deep, I kept paddling onwards. I reached the middle of the river, and stopped paddling to take a short rest. And what I heard at that moment was indescribably special. I heard absolutely nothing. Not a splash in the water, not another voice, not cars on the street, nothing. And in that very moment, my mind cleared and I discovered what it was truly like to achieve inner peace.

In the years following, I have tried to replicate this moment, to create this humbling feeling again. Although it has been more than five years since then, it has only happened once more, on a family trip to Myrtle Beach, South Carolina during Winter Break. At midnight, after everyone in the beach house had gone to sleep, I left my room and exited onto the fourth story balcony. I had no jacket, gloves, or even shoes on to protect myself from the 35 degree night. Regardless, I sat down on the plastic chair and stared out at the waves breaking silently onto the shore. And in that moment, inner peace was once again achieved.

Through these experiences, I have realized that inner peace cannot be willed into existence. The following night in Myrtle Beach, I sat again on the chair alone in the cold night, but my mind prevented me from arriving at peace. However, I have gained an understanding that moments like those should be savored. That night when my mind stopped thinking temporarily, the thing that brought it back to reality was wondering when I could have another peaceful moment. I should have instead remained in the moment and let go of the future.

What brings you inner peace? Can you fully clear your mind when you meditate?